Konbanwa, Bitches!

*Warning: I have been reading Jen Lancaster's new book, "Bright Lights, Big Ass". So if you do not like bitter humor and the usage of numerous three and four letter words, please do not read this particular entry.

Hey ya'll. I'm supposed to be studying for one of the most important exams of my life, but f that! It's time to update the blog!

So the past month has been one of the best:)

After saying goodbye to Morgan (never having to sit next to that dumb ass, suck up contract recruiter EVER again), It was time to have a week of relaxation in MD (read: taking care of two of the most bad ass dogs in the country).

And then it was time to start my amazing new job at a big four accounting firm. How I love it, people! How I adore the fact that I actually get pats on my back and kudos for doing my work, as opposed to being an anonymous worker drone in my cube.

Work has only been in session for three weeks, and I have waved a co-worker goodbye, hosted a meeting, signed on to a major project, and told an asshat stalker to stay the fuck away from me. That's right, I had a stalker. Let's recount asshat "romancing" of the new HR employee:

So KKK (k k the kanine, since i didn't want to use kracker, kock, or kunt, and I don't want anyone to confuse this guy with my friend KK)sees young, fresh new employee go into the lounge. He oogles her. She's thinking to herself, "why the FUCK is this asshat staring at me". But of course, she has manners and she introduces herself as the new employee. He says: "oh nice handshake. you look good". She is caught off guard, and she's like "what?????" (did she hear this correctly?). KKK says, "oh i must see you again". she asks him who her is, and he gives his name as KKK. she wants him OFF her back, so she says the maybe we can have lunch sometime line (cuz she's sweet like that). as he walks over to her cube, he proceeds to say shit about her VW. She is pretty pissed. But it gets better, guys.

At lunchtime, KKK is at her desk. She tells him she's got a meeting, can't go today. He leans his over her, takes her freakin post its and writes down his name and cell number with the line "so you don't have any other excuses".

Asshat KKK leaves post it messages of "please call me, with his name and cell phone number". he also comes over to her desk, and CALLS her a couple of times. One time, he calls and asks for her personal email. She says that she does not feel comfortable with that, and she's come to work to actually do her job, not socialize with and asshat like him.

And the culmination is an accidental meeting in the hallway. he says let me explain. she says, you've been calling and coming over to my desk, you gave out your cell. i work in HR. and what you're doing is harrassment. KKK claims he's sorry. She hopes that she never has to see his asshat behind ever again.

Other than that, work is amazing. I could practically cry as a result of my sheer happiness in the position, happiness with my bosses that actually care about my career growth, and happiness resulting from nice coworkers.

I also like going to NYC all the time too. Yay for that!

I hate cleaning up Rascal's poo when I get home from work. Boo to that. No snaps.

I love getting enormous paychecks and purchasing $120 Creme De La Mer (in a one ounce jar!).

ooh, and I love going to the Dominican hairdressers to get my hair done! 10 shampoos, and I get one free! Whee!


what am i doing tonight? studying so I can be ready for a kick ass cinco de mayo celebration! ciao!