Here's a little story

Once upon a time there was a cute princess named Alisha. She had a wonderful childhood, albeit the doctor's claims of strep throat when she really had allergies. Of course this wonderful childhood came to end when she reached puberty and started having severe abdominal pains for 40 days out of the year, sometimes longer. Her dear sweet doctor gave her a plethora of medications, including 15 types of birth control pills. Finally, he told her, honey, you might have a problem, and you want to have little brats someday right? She nodded her head profusely. "Well I have the answer for you", proclaimed her do-gooder doctor. 'Before you embark on your glamorous grad school life, I think that you should have a laparoscopy to see if you're sick. If I find out that you are, I'm going to put you on Lupron, the miracle drug, and you will be symptom free for 6 whole months. After that, I will prescribe another special thing, and you will never be in pain again." Of course, little Alisha jumped up an down at the thought of not being in pain and not ever having to go into that god forsaken aisle in the grocery store. So Alisha endured the pain of her laparoscopy, not being able to walk for 10-14 freaking days, and popping Vicodin like it was ecstasy. She endured the tears and woes of not having a flat stomach anymore and the having a caboose and thighs the size of phatty mcphat. Then, after her dear sweet doctor did find that she was indeed sick, the poor child endured a shot in a place that should NEVER happen, but was still quite optimistic. Little did she know that the "miracle drug" was going to force her into mood swings, lack of personality, lack of care, and memory loss which she mourned over. She was glad for the 6 month respite, but did not like what was happening to her. So she was excited after the 6 months ended. Dear sweet doctor put her on Aviane, but was like, oh you won't be experiencing any problems, you will be fine. Well um, could you please explain to me why the HECK I've been ill for the past week? And today why I'm popping Aleve like it's candy? And now Alisha is back to square 1, but a lot more pissed AND inducing wrinkles by frowning too much. The end.