Graduation Weekend

Let's give a recap of the glorious weekend.

I drove up to New Haven on Thursday night, which gave me a chance to see my parents and aunt, and also check out their duplex suite. hot damn!

We had a fun filled day on Friday. We walked around downtown, doing a little shopping. And we had high tea at the cute Celtic cafe across from my apt building!Friday night was the grad school banquet. I wore a $650 Marc Jacobs dress. Ya'll bitches ain't got nothing on me, lol. So I could only drink one and a half glasses of wine, cuz i had to drive the parentals home. But aside from seeing ppl, and Stuart telling me that I'll be rich and famous, the banquet was a flop. Who's idea was it to have the banquet at some far away country club? If it would've been at the Omni, I could've gotten tipsy/drunk, and walked my ass home. Also, the entrees were horrible (bones in the fish), and the music sucked. I tell it how it is.

Saturday= graduation day. Finally, servering all ties from New Haven (aside from my apt). Before going to the school, I walked over to the diner, in my sexy dress. Apparently, since I got there at 7:30 AM, it looked like I was getting food after a wild night.
So, graduation. Lemme tell you, it was hot as hell at graduation, it was held outside. People were passing out from the heat. They read all of the darn names. I was annoyed. Some bitch asked for my tassel, never brought it back to me. So I had to go and snatch the tassel from the bitch's cap.
At least there was Olive Garden to be had after the ceremony. And then a long nap.
Erin and I decided that we also needed to go out that night. And that we were going to be friendly with the mens. We went to Black Bear, and she met a hottie. I will prolly never go to BB again, cuz it's not exactly my um, scene. But we did go to Alchemy, which definitely is my scene! K, so we made friends with the bartender. Erin got free diet coke, and I got red bull and hennessey. But then, we were on the dance floor with the mens, and all of a sudden my ass was grabbed (and i was wearing a mini mini), and i was licked. I mean, this guy lunged to kiss me, and he instead licked my upper lip. I was disgusted and scarred. I relayed the story to the bartender, and he gave me free vodka and cranberry! yay! Also, by 2:30, hotties were coming to say bye and get numbers. And then we went out for pizza. By the way, the look works.

Sunday, my fam and I drove down to Jersey City/Secaucus. We ended up eating at various tasty restaurants and going to really cheap outlets! My nice parents bought rascal and me an air conditioner, and all was well with the world.

And now, it's time to tend to my little 4 legged bad ass.

Clearly...

I am in no mood to work today, despite getting myself here before 8 AM, yay! So, here are some insights:

1. Apparently, all of the Japanese ppl live in Fort Lee. Take me with you, please!

2. Being the mother of a furry friend does not entitle you to a proper Mother's Day celebration. (i.e., "oh, that little rodent didn't really come from your loins, so you're not exactly a mother") Bitches. I happen to clean up just as many "accidents" as any person with a baby, and I have to soothe the wailing child practically every five minutes. Oh, and he has a carseat AND teething rings.

3. As a result of moving to two different areas of NJ within the next few months, my "newbie" time is hiked up to an 8 month time frame. Is this a blessing or a curse? I've already been stalked once.

4. Is it ok to kiss on the first meeting? If not, then I guess it's not okay to tell. dammit.

5. I'm sorry, but I just can't study for a full weekend anymore. I ended up going to the mr softee truck and getting a delicious chocolate sundae with nuts. I ended up parading rascal up and down Central Ave. I ended up going out. Solitary confinement just doesn't work for me :(

"Shalom, Muthafuckas"- Jen Lancaster

Well, it has been quite a busy week. And on top of that, I will have to be a hermit this weekend to study for an hrci exam, aka "that damn exam".

I did want to write a quickie, before Ugly Betty comes on.

1. Director is scary sometimes. AHHH!
2. It is NOT a good idea to take painkillers at work NO MATTER HOW MUCH PAIN YOU'RE IN. Let's just say that I said the funniest shit, and nearly collapsed multiple times on Monday. Gotta love it.
3. Walking down the stairs does not constitute daily exercise.
4. Not everyone that knocks on my door is delivering a present for me (boo).

Konbanwa, Bitches!

*Warning: I have been reading Jen Lancaster's new book, "Bright Lights, Big Ass". So if you do not like bitter humor and the usage of numerous three and four letter words, please do not read this particular entry.

Hey ya'll. I'm supposed to be studying for one of the most important exams of my life, but f that! It's time to update the blog!

So the past month has been one of the best:)

After saying goodbye to Morgan (never having to sit next to that dumb ass, suck up contract recruiter EVER again), It was time to have a week of relaxation in MD (read: taking care of two of the most bad ass dogs in the country).

And then it was time to start my amazing new job at a big four accounting firm. How I love it, people! How I adore the fact that I actually get pats on my back and kudos for doing my work, as opposed to being an anonymous worker drone in my cube.

Work has only been in session for three weeks, and I have waved a co-worker goodbye, hosted a meeting, signed on to a major project, and told an asshat stalker to stay the fuck away from me. That's right, I had a stalker. Let's recount asshat "romancing" of the new HR employee:

So KKK (k k the kanine, since i didn't want to use kracker, kock, or kunt, and I don't want anyone to confuse this guy with my friend KK)sees young, fresh new employee go into the lounge. He oogles her. She's thinking to herself, "why the FUCK is this asshat staring at me". But of course, she has manners and she introduces herself as the new employee. He says: "oh nice handshake. you look good". She is caught off guard, and she's like "what?????" (did she hear this correctly?). KKK says, "oh i must see you again". she asks him who her is, and he gives his name as KKK. she wants him OFF her back, so she says the maybe we can have lunch sometime line (cuz she's sweet like that). as he walks over to her cube, he proceeds to say shit about her VW. She is pretty pissed. But it gets better, guys.

At lunchtime, KKK is at her desk. She tells him she's got a meeting, can't go today. He leans his over her, takes her freakin post its and writes down his name and cell number with the line "so you don't have any other excuses".

Asshat KKK leaves post it messages of "please call me, with his name and cell phone number". he also comes over to her desk, and CALLS her a couple of times. One time, he calls and asks for her personal email. She says that she does not feel comfortable with that, and she's come to work to actually do her job, not socialize with and asshat like him.

And the culmination is an accidental meeting in the hallway. he says let me explain. she says, you've been calling and coming over to my desk, you gave out your cell. i work in HR. and what you're doing is harrassment. KKK claims he's sorry. She hopes that she never has to see his asshat behind ever again.

Other than that, work is amazing. I could practically cry as a result of my sheer happiness in the position, happiness with my bosses that actually care about my career growth, and happiness resulting from nice coworkers.

I also like going to NYC all the time too. Yay for that!

I hate cleaning up Rascal's poo when I get home from work. Boo to that. No snaps.

I love getting enormous paychecks and purchasing $120 Creme De La Mer (in a one ounce jar!).

ooh, and I love going to the Dominican hairdressers to get my hair done! 10 shampoos, and I get one free! Whee!


what am i doing tonight? studying so I can be ready for a kick ass cinco de mayo celebration! ciao!

Hayden Harnett Sample Sale Review

As a result of my new sublease (more on that in my next post), I had the opportunity to attend the Hayden Harnett Sample Sale on Wednesday and Thursday of last week.

On the first day of the sale (Tuesday, 4/10), I called and asked them to hold the Beatrice bag. Of course they told me that they could not do it (no one ever holds sample sale items for people). But I told the guy that I'm a major fan, and that I own a plethora of the bags. So he held it for me!

Next day, I rushed home from work and took the complicated dollar van for the first time into the City. It was 6:55, and I was still on the van. The sample sale closed at 7. So I called and let them know that there was no way I could arrive on time, and asked if they could send it to me. They said yes, and took down my credit card info!!

Well, I happened to get into the City at 7:02, and I ran to the sale. When I got there, I knocked on the door, and they told me that it was closed. But I was like, no, it's me, you have to let me in! So they did. I bought the Beatrice bag in saddle, so gorgeous and half off! But the best part is that they let me stay til around 7:30, and I was also able to purchase the Suki bag in black (which they gave to me for a discount off of the discounted price!). I also received a free tassel for my Chocolate Havana. All in all, I was soooo very impressed with the customers service and their catering to me. I felt like a VIP celeb!

So...I decided to go back the next day! I arrived late again, but was still able to stay for awhile. In the end, I chose the Catalina in Olive and a black coin purse (for all the tolls I gotta pay on the way to work). I was very impressed!

So the real life sale was amazing. So imagine my disappointment when I saw the items at the online sample sale (running from Saturday til Monday). The prices were higher (my Suki was less than $150), and there were wayyyy better items in person. Oh well, I'm so glad that I was able to go to the one in NYC!

Last Day Foibles

Today is my last day at my internship. I wonder what the rest of this day will bring. I've already had one quite embarrasing/awkward moment:

The cleaning lady walked in on me while I was on the potty! Those freakin doors are a little stubborn sometimes, so maybe I didn't COMPLETELY close the darn thing. But I hear her confidently walk in, and continue to the stall door, and as she opens it, I stand up in an attempt to close the door, exposing ALL of the goodies to her. Eeek.

I think that I have been scarred for life.

Miracles

Miraculously, Chestnut was located on Saturday! The turd that doggynapped him prolly thought that he was too much of a handful, and turned him into the Humane Society. Yay!!! My baby's back!

This leaves us with the dilemma: I now have TWO dogs. I purchased a yorkie last Tuesday. His official name is The Little Rascal of the Northeast. He goes by Rascal or Raz. Rascal has been a little bad ass, haha. He's goes on the puppy pads 75% of the time. He goes in the litterbox 5% of the time. And the rest of the time, he is naughty and goes on the floor. I give him lectures about how mummy does not want to be cleaning up his messes, but he doesn't seem to remember/care too much, haha. He is also in his teething stage. Wires, paper, everything. I have bitter appled my entire freakin apartment. And yet, he still does not Looooveee the tons of chew toys I bought him. He is spoiled. He has a carseat and diapers. He also has a doggy carrier. And he sleeps on the bed, usually above my head. Despite his puppy flaws, there's still a lot of amazing things about him. Like, he's quite calm and doesn't bark much. He is also a major cuddler. I absolutely adore the creature.

I have been blessed lately. I can't really say why yet, because I feel as though my plans aren't finalized. That's why I haven't broadcasted it. But in a week or two, when it's planned out, I'm definitely posting about it! It's just an exciting time in my life, and I'm very happy.